This past week, we all went to the two awareness week assemblies.  I usually don’t go to school assemblies because I have found that they are insulting to my intelligence and are unentertaining.   I decided, however, that I would give school assemblies another chance, and so I went to the three-screen assembly on Tuesday.  It was the worst assembly I have ever been to in my life.  It was at that moment that I decided to write an article on the awareness week assemblies. 

My opinion of the three-screen assembly was widespread.  Senior Carlo Diy said, “Someone should tell these people that they are spending millions of dollars on not relating to kids.”  And then he promptly napped through the second half of the presentation.  Senior Matt Roberts said, “That’s it, use big name bands and extreme sports to make the message seem worthwhile.”  The superficiality of the company who makes the presentation was so obvious that people were insulted that their time had been wasted.  Senior Stephen Demuth said, “Words cannot describe how %#&*ing ridiculous this assembly was.  I am totally %#$*ing speechless.  All I know is that now I have a headache.”  Senior Bill Bradsky had a similar, if less vulgar, opinion. “This was the most boring and pointless assembly yet.  The school should make these assemblies optional.  I was getting a headache and I wanted to leave and take some Tylenol, but then I realized that I’m not allowed to bring it for my own personal use and the school can’t give me any.”  Senior Erika Forster said, “I thought it was the worst three screen assembly I had ever seen, but the music was okay. I thought it was pretty cheesy and lame. I was talking to my friends during the majority of it, though, so I don’t really know.”

What is accomplished when students are forced to go to see some prepackaged presentation probably produced by people whose principle purpose is pleasing politicians? A backlash will occur.  In their haste in trying to be able to market their product as both relevant and educational, the creators of the film neglected to realize that the bands that are supposed to promote the anti-drug message use drugs more frequently than the average person.  Staind is known for their excessive marijuana use.  They were even on the cover of High Times.  What type of message is this supposed to send?  Were the creators just indifferent, hypocritical, or ignorant about the bands whose messages they are trying to promote?  Obviously the people who produced this film are not in touch with what teenagers deal with and what decisions they make in their lives.  The idea that a person could call up a top-forty radio station and proceed to create an anti-drug film based on a list of popular songs is outrageous.  In the future, I suggest that the school think long and hard before forcing students to participate in an activity that is as waste of a time as this one was.

The second assembly, was phenomenal.  Senior Erika Forster said, “The mime was very funny, especially when he did this *makes funny face* Ha Ha.”  She then proceeded to lock herself into an invisible box.  I thought that the crowd was going to heckle the mime and he wouldn’t be able to get his message across, but he did a very good job of being funny, entertaining, and effective.  The mime assembly was the best assembly I had ever been to, and I was very impressed.  Congratulations to the school for finally doing something I approve of. Okay, I’m done.

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