I Want To Be Anarchy
Kyle Veremans

For thousands of years, humans have been striving to find the perfect government. Perfection is non-existent, so the next best thing is no government. This system is commonly known as anarchy and is the perfect way to go. Americans should subscribe to anarchy because there will be no national debt or self-serving presidents and governors because Americans will be too busy trying to find food and shelter while watching out for predators, so that we can all live a self-serving life. There will be no overseas wars because everyone will be busy fighting over the last bits of food and, best of all, there will be no structured jobs or schools. There will only be fun in the sun and hunting each other.

In "Anarchy America" arguing about which movie to see on a Saturday night will be obsolete along with holiday shopping crowds, the two things we hate the most. Americans will finally be financially equal because money will be used as toilet paper and people will no longer be respected for their sex or race but for their survival skills. Forget about high gas prices because in "Anarchy America" gas will be given away free to the first people who show up to their local gas station with automatic weapons. Don’t waste another day out of the year filing taxes because the economy will be as useful as a new Dell. America’s favorite phrase "a thousand channel but nothing is on" will be prehistoric because TV stations will be used as shelters.

Don’t worry about being hassled by "the pigs" or "the man" because following those pesky laws is all a joke. Run as fast as you can and steal all you can grab and don’t worry about your fellow man or religion or homosexuals marrying each other because you’re an anarchist.

Before we all die like animals or from the plague, "Anarchy America" will be a happening place, a nonstop party if you will. So this election when someone asks you for whom you’re going to vote, just say, "I don’t care for voting. I want anarchy." In no time "Anarchy America" will be coming to a city near you, unless you heed the laws and rules that America has set.